Ambiguous Grief, Grief, Parenting

Why I Don’t Only Cry In The Shower (the worst parenting advice I’ve received)

This article was first published on Thrive Global.  Click on the link below to read the piece in its entirety. pexels-photo-736843.jpeg

“If you’re going to cry,” they said, “only do it in the shower.”

This was a recurring piece of advice given to me after my husband moved out.  But I had a major problem with it:  If I hid my tears from my three children, and limited my crying only to my time in the shower, my skin would be perma-pruned. Why? Because I’m the Varsity Team Captain of Crying. I wept my way through 99% of last year.

I was crying because I had found myself in an unexpected divorce and a single (and scared) mother of three. Shortly after I turned 40, I discovered my husband’s double life. To say is was heartbreaking grossly minimizes the entire soul crushing, the-world-is-upside-down-experience. He couldn’t deny it, I had found too much evidence. So, he finally confessed, disclosed more stomach-lurching details, and moved out three days later. Overnight, our happy family of 5 was forever changed.

With three shocked and confused tween/teens watching, …………

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